Expectant Management…
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This term we use for our labor admissions…for those mamas in active labor, with consistent contractions, dilation change, and overall labor progress. Expectant Management.
The care of these mamas looks different…no medication given to induce or interventions necessary for augmentation. No signing of consents for surgery or additional interventions. Some bounce silently on the birthing ball in a dimly lit room while I massage their back and some request the pain meds to help get them through.
Expectant Management. No unnecessary intervention. Just watching and waiting and participating in the pain with a purpose, that is childbirth. Expectant of new life and embracing management of the journey to get there.
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Typing this phrase out in a patient’s chart last week and it got me to thinking how closely this resembles our life sometimes…those seasons where we are wrestling well, fully engaged in the journey and pivoting and pushing-in appropriately. No intervention or augmentation necessary, just watching and waiting and participating in the pain with a purpose. These seasons can sometimes feel long and unbearable and we wonder if any change is even present. We feel the pains as a wave that endlessly beat us down, one after another and we wonder if it’s even doing anything to bring about new life.
If the labor room has taught me anything, it’s this…. expectant management is the absolute best admission criteria. You’ve found your space and you’re holding it well. You’ve proven that you don’t need intervention or augmentation in your pursuit of birthing new life and with each contraction of your plan, you’re actually birthing greater purposes…. these spaces allow for your support team to rally around you with comfort and compassion, because we all know that you’re well on your way. It’s simply about waiting for the process to do its work…a work that can’t be rushed.
Are you in a season of expectant management? Are you feeling weary from the wave of contractions relentlessly pursuing you? My friend, carry on because you’ve got the best admission criteria! Find the one to massage your back, the one to hold your hand and speak strength into you, the one to remind you of the purpose of the pain. And know that you are watching and waiting well, and new life is soon to come…
Career Adventures://
This week the labor room held our grief. 36 weeks, no heartbeat. Ultrasound showed normal development 3 days ago, but today…. life was absent. I walked into a room where anger was palpable. Questions were asked with no responses and all I could seem to get in response were blank stares and frustrated words. The nurse gave me report outside the room and told me she’s in denial, she needs a social consult, she’s been cussing me out all day.
Mending.
I took a breath, prayed a quick prayer and entered that room knowing that I needed to mend. I held the space, assessed the need and cared for the hurting. I realized she hadn’t been seen as a human in over 24 hours and as we approached her second day of induction for a fetus that would never breath its first breath, I realized she needed to be seen. So I offered a toothbrush, a bed bath, a comb for her hair. I gave her warm blankets and fresh socks and I managed to find ice cream when she was sick of the chicken broth and jello she was allowed.
Mending. Her posture started to change. She answered my questions and made eye contact with me. She told me we could be friends and she made little jokes to engage me in conversation. Her anger was softened, and she talked about her baby.
And then it came time to give birth to death…. she pushed and wrestled and as she regained her strength in those moments in-between contractions, she looked deep into my soul like I’ve never been seen before… she saw me too. We counted off and held that space of grief together. Birth. Death. Beauty. Grief.
As they brought her baby to the warmer away from the bed upon her request, I detailed the beauty of his formed body to her…. his perfect lips and curly hair. His smooth skin and gentle face. She squeezed my hand and requested I bring him close…. she cradled that babe and cherished his being.
That night as I tucked her into your postpartum bed with the empty bassinette beside her, I held her hand and thanked her for the pleasure of getting to care for her and her baby. She told me this…’next time I come here, when I come to have my next baby…I’m asking for you as my nurse, because I want you to be there when I give birth to life’.
Mended.
Choking back tears, I responded with, “there’s no place I would rather be. I’m glad we could be friends.”
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Love on your people & keep in perspective your beautiful legacy in light of eternity.…
Love and Blessings,
Lindsey xoxo
Lindsey, God is using you in such a powerful way in the lives of Mamas! Praising God for your kind and loving heart and your “Fathers eyes” to see the need and how to respond. This is Jesus living out His life in you.
God bless you honey!
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@SharonJones
Thank you, friend! So honored to be in those labor rooms and thankful for this space in history to do this work that He’s called me to💕
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Oh my precious friend, you’re carrying the light with such beauty! Oh chosen one, the waiting and striving can seem endless but such light and beauty can be seen in you along the way. Keep shining because this dark world needs it so desperately. Even while commenting and thinking of you I feel His light, love and presence. Please let me know how I can be praying for you!♥️
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@Carolsorgea
Thank you for your words of encouragement and grace! So blessed by your constant presence in my life and honored to call you a friend! Love and miss you💕
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Wow!!! Such raw emotion made beautiful! God bless you Lindsey!!! 🙏 Miss you! 💕
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Hi, Lindsay I really loved this post … even and especially in one-on-one situation we need to see others as humans — not patients, immigrants, refugees, unbelievers, others, etc. — with all the regular human struggles going on in the background of what we can see on the surface. Don’t assume you know/understand … try walking in their shoes, ask questions in order to help do that. So proud of you … asking and listening to God’s direction in caring for this woman that He loves so much … hearing her heart and giving the gift of presence. Well done, good and faithful servant.
How’s the rest of life going? … haven’t heard from you or your mom in awhile … busy life I’m sure … k
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Wow! God is definitely using you in mighty ways to share His love and grace to bring healing to hurting hearts, Lindsey!🥰
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